I joined the ladies (and gentleman) of Las Bombas for my first group training walk on Saturday. We were slated for 6 miles. I did 4.25 with them and then another 3 later. More important than the miles, though, I learned a few things. Important things. Things that it will probably take me some time to actually implement.
Let’s start with why I only did 4.25 miles with the Las Bombas.
1. I was getting blisters on my right foot. 2. I wasn’t properly hydrated for the last loop. 3. I got paged in to work. That last one was the tipping point. It turned out to be nothing, but I didn’t know it at the time. Had I not turned back to go to work, I might have tried to continue ignoring items one and two — to my detriment. (BTW, thank you, Kathleen, for walking back with me!)
We had a record high low Saturday. It was already 95 degrees when we set out just before 6 a.m., and the humidity was nasty. For us, anyway.
I did fine for the first loop of 4 miles. Kinda slow, but OK. I was the caboose of the pack, but not dreadfully far back.
I had mentioned to one of the walkers that I could feel a couple blisters forming, but since we weren’t too far from the end of our loop, I didn’t see the need to pull over and have a look.
Once we stopped, a lovely lady came charging over with a very handy packet of blister stuff. I thanked her and told her I’d be fine. Mistake number one.
Mistake number two was assuming the frozen-solid PowerAde that I had left in my car would actually have melted to a drinkable consistency by the time we finished our first loop. It felt really good on my neck, but it was still a berry-flavored ice rock. My mom warned me to thaw it earlier, but I didn’t listen. (That’ll teach me.)
Mistake number three was not popping into AJ’s to buy a drink and a snack. Yes, we were in the parking lot of a store and I didn’t go in. I even had credit card with me.
Mistake number four was turning down blister help a second time.
When we set out for the second part of the walk, I hadn’t had more than a few sips of water, no snack and hadn’t looked at my foot.
You can stop shaking your head. And get your face out of your palm. (Yes, I can see you so I know you totally just rolled your eyes.)
So, why was I so stupid?
Let me share a little story.
About 100 years ago, I was a competitive baton twirler. OK, it was really a little more than 20 years ago, but still, that’s practically another lifetime.
In the weeks before I went to my first national competition, I kept having this dream. I’d finish performing and go up to the judge to get my score. Each time, the judge would look me square in the eye and say, “What are you doing here? You suck!”
This became a nightly thing. It was great for the confidence.
I went to the competition and did just fine — won a couple of events, placed in some, didn’t place in others. And at no time did anybody tell me I sucked. Even when I kinda did. During one routine I actually managed to chuck my baton all the way across the entire arena – over five lanes of other twirlers trying to do their thing. It was not pretty. (Interestingly enough, I was afraid doing just that and even had an image in my head of my baton flying — not in a good way — right before I sent it sailing. Can you say “self-fulfilling prophecy”?)
Now, more than 20 years later (ack!), some incarnation of my “You suck!” dream still haunts me every now and then.
The moral of the story is that I, like most people, am my own worst critic. And I’m really good at it. That’s something I’m going to have to overcome.
I can’t stand that people might think poorly of me. And I really don’t like not being good at stuff right off the bat. I also have a pretty significant fear of failure. When you’ve set yourself up to fail, it’s an easy goal to accomplish.
I didn’t realize until later that all this was in my head. I now realize that there was only one person judging me during that Saturday morning walk. Me.
I have to realize that while I might feel like I’m holding people back, nobody is going to think any less of me for being at the back of the pack. They’re just happy that I’m there, excited that one more person has taken on the challenge to help find a cure for a horrendous disease. Nobody is going to hold a blister or two against me, although they might think me a bit silly for turning down help. And they’re totally right on that one.
So, the big lesson I learned on Saturday, and one I will probably need to have pounded into my thick skull, is to let go of my own issues. People have way better things to do than judge me for my shortcomings — perceived (key word here) and otherwise.
The second big lesson from Saturday — listen to my body. And don’t ignore a fully stocked store just because I have frozen bottle in my hand. You can’t drink a block of ice and hydration is so, so, so essential. Especially when it’s icky hot and humid. Duh.
The third big lesson from Saturday — if somebody offers help, take it! Take. It. I’m sure you’ve heard that whining causes blisters. Well, apparently so does pride. Serves me right. (I couldn’t get the ones on the outside of my foot. I’m not that flexible.)
I thought I had left all my pride behind when I signed up for this journey and decided to share everything about it — the good, the bad and the embarrassing. (I am not pregnant!) I guess I was mistaken on that one, and that makes me my own worst enemy. It’s not an uncommon affliction.
Y’all know how I rely on my car radio for cosmic guidance and perspective. Well, when I was driving home Saturday, it did that random switch thing it did a few weeks ago. That time, it was “I Can See Clearly Now” on what started as a crummy day. This time it was Pink’s “Hazard to Myself,” followed by “Celebration.” Bella is quite smart, isn’t she? (And yes, my car has a name. What of it?)
So, instead of beating myself up and saying I only made it through 4.25 miles Saturday morning, I’m turning it around and saying, “Hey, I walked more than 4 miles!” And I was smart enough (sort of) to stop before something really embarrassing happened. Like passing out. (Now that would have been inconvenient for everyone.)
As fellow Komen Ambassador and fount of all kinds of 3-Day wisdom Kristen C. (She’s walking in Boston in just a few days!) reminded me, there’s a big mental component to training. She’s right. I won’t get anywhere if I keep telling myself “I suck” and hang on to the negative. That’s a sure way to sabotage myself.
Saturday’s walk wasn’t a failure. It was just a reallocation of miles. — 4.25 in the morning and 3 in the afternoon. More importantly, it was a learning experience, and that’s what training it all about.
That doesn’t mean I’m not going to work on my pacing. (I haven’t figured out why I do so much better on the treadmill than out and about. It’s weird.) It just means I’m not going to worry about it. All I can do is my best, and that means I have to keep going. Do I want to come in last? Not really. But somebody has to. And if I do come in last, at least I will have come in, right? And that will be something to be proud of!
PS Thanks for adopting me for the morning, Las Bombas!
I too am a fat girl walking, more like a fat grandma walking, and reading your blog has helped me keep going. I have done a few training walks and I am always slower than everyone else, but the leaders keep telling me “it is a journey not a race”, however I still feel like I am holding everyone up, so decided to walk on my own, at my pace. As for the blisters, I ignored them and one got infected, so be very carefull.
Thanks for your blog, I am going to the gym tonight because of you.
Great tips and great advice from everyone. I, too, am one that doesn’t like to ask for help or accept help or think I can’t do something once I set my mind to it. A few months ago, when I started out on my training walks, I kind of neglected to always eat lunch before I went walking. Or tell my walking partner that I needed to stop and go get something to eat during a walk because I wanted to complete my walk. Oh, and I didn’t really tell my walking partner that I am diabetic. Now we usually walk in the park but this one day we decided to stay closer to pre-school and were walking in an actual neighborhood. Good thing because about 2 miles in I started to feel my blood sugar plummet. My friend had to run to a stranger’s house and ask them for some juice and a snack. She left me sitting on the side of the walking path. I was sweating and woozy (?) and just feeling awful. And then I felt more embarrassed that my friend and this man I don’t know are standing there trying to force me to eat and drink more than I really needed to but they were just trying to help. Now – talk about mortifying. You don’t want to be the person who draws all the attention from nearly passing out on the side of road from dehydration and low blood sugar (which can happen to anyone who has not eaten properly). I now walk with a little backpack, keep my water with me all the time and keep 3 or 4 snacks in my bag just in case (for me and anyone else who might need it). It’s actually been working out great because I don’t even have to stop my walks. If I feel the feeling coming on, I just eat a pear or a pack of peanut butter crackers and it really revives me quickly. So keep something with you all the time!
Now, have you tried the Body Glide for your feet? I use it every time I go walking (and am up to 6 mile walks) and I am normally a person whose feet blister very easily and I have not had one blister since starting my walks. I swear it is the Body Glide! Congrats on the 7 miles in one day. Just like our big walk, it’s not all going to be fast and continuous. We’re going to need little breaks in between. You are going to do awesome!
Heather
That is some story, Heather! We can all learn from your experience. I’m just glad you weren’t walking alone. That could have been disastrous. Thank you for sharing, and for your support and encouragement. I actually have been using Friction Block on my feet. It’s Body Glide’s Johnson & Johnson cousin. Good luck in your training!
You and I must be twins in another life. I have the exact same mentality and training for the 3-Day is bringing out in me all of the same points you are struggling with. I played volleyball in high school and college and am highly competitive. So I often deal with that negative voice in my head telling me that I don’t need help whether it’s borrowing a band-aid, accepting assistance, and heaven forbid I actually ask for help. I fully agree with you though, that it is not a helpful voice, in fact it’s detrimental. Your post has really brought to light what I’ve been struggling most with in training for the 3-Day and now that I can see it I think it will be much easier to quiet and eventually shut off that negative voice.
I hope your blisters heal quickly and you’re back on the road in no time with your new outlook. I think you’ll enjoy training much more from here on out.
It’s funny, Tésa. I’m finding lots of past-life/long-lost siblings! As I’m sure you — and many others — know, that little competitive voice is both the angel and the devil on my shoulder. It pushes me, which is good. But then sometimes… well, you know what happens. I was reading a book this morning — a Nora Roberts beach read — and one of the characters was talking about how comparisons are designed so that somebody comes up short. It’s true. It’s also out natural inclination to compare ourselves to others — in pretty much every way possible. I’ve never been great at turning off the chatter in my brain, but I think I’m learning. This experience — with all of the amazing support I’ve received — can only help! I refuse to give in to doubt and I won’t be a casualty of my own head. I’ve promised myself that the next time somebody offers me help, the answer will be, “Yes, thank you!” And that is perfectly OK.
I am thrilled to have known you in those “baton days”… I am thrilled to be sharing in your experience now!! Your ability to eloquently share your experiences with others is one of the many traits that make you a truly special lady. Your writing inspires me!
Thank you, Lisa! You know those baton days — and you — are a big part of who I am today. You were an awesome coach. You taught me more than just fishtails and backhand catches.
(BTW, would you believe I can still do Fujimi rolls??? They’re not pretty, but I can do ‘em without cheating. Or breaking anything in the living room.) Thank you for checking in on me and for the kind comments. I’d love to catch up some time if you’re free for lunch or dinner.
I was a baton twirler, too! I’m giggling so much over you chucking your baton across the arena. Been there, done that!
LOL, Missy. I think every twirler has done that at least once. Isn’t it practically a twirling rite of passage?
Okay Cat – Here is some REALLY IMPORTANT info I know I gave you before…. 1) put the blister stuff on BEFORE you leave the house – when you have NO blisters at all!!! They will form in the same places every time, so head them off at the pass and treat them as you would the flu with a vaccine! You know your hot spots , so put the blister covers and mole skin on the unblistered skin to have no blisters after the walk too. 2) The frozen bottle will melt faster on your body than in the car. So carry it with you… also – where is your fanny pack?? If you do not have one, BUY IT NOW!! You will need it on the walk itself and you need to get used to the weight of it as you walk, hense the training part. 3) There is a reason that the pit stops are every 3 miles on the walk – because that is when you need a snack and water refill. Carry your snack and water with you. I hate water so I drink gatorade instead, but you need the salt, so DO NOT ONLY drink water. 4) Carry a change of socks- sweaty socks will cause blisters just as soon as anything else. Change socks on the longer walks.
Okay enough of that … YEAH 7 Miles!!! You are awesome girl! Keep it up – you can do it! Love ya!
I did put on the blister stuff before I left, Susan! That was actually one of the reasons I didn’t want to do anything. My foot was all taped up and I didn’t want to undo it all and then re-do it! I still should have, I know. As for the pack, I’m buying on this week. I haven’t found one I like yet, but I think I’m just going to have to suck it up. And yes, I will be carrying all he necessities with me. I’m still ironing out the snack thing. I don’t like to eat when I’m exercising, but I’m just going to have to get over that one, too. Thank you for the tips and the cheering, m’dear!
I’m really impressed with your honesty! Everything that you said there is totally right, most especially that the entire point of training is to learn and to get better. And you are doing exactly that. You cannot ask for more from yourself than keep striving to get better. (Or as you Energizer bloggers like to say “Keep Going”!)
Also, as Beth said, on the 3 Day, we don’t celebrate the first person to finish. We all stand up together as one family and cheer for the last person to finish the route for the day. It is about supporting each other on own journeys, no matter what route those journeys may take or how quickly we complete them. It is one of the very best moments of any 3 Day event.
Keep up the good work and take care of those feet. In a few weeks when you’re banging out ten milers, you will look back at the Cat that wrote this post and smile knowing how very far you have come!
~ Kristen
You’re very kind, Kristen. I’m figuring out that the only thing standing in my way is me. And that’s just plain silly. All I can do is my best — whatever that happens to be. And whatever my best does turn out to be, that’s just fine (she says now). Thank you so much for your ongoing support and encouragement. While I know I’m not ready yet, I can’t wait for the event to experience for myself what you and Beth and so many others have been telling me.
Oh, woman, I *so* know about the critic thing and the “no learning curve/be perfect right off the bat” thing.
But today was a valuable day for me on that front (as you know from Twitter), shredding the “When Smart People Fail” book. What the hell was *that* doing on my bookshelf? And why did I buy it when I was working at one of the biggest newspapers in the country?
Today became the day I decided I have not failed. Ever. How’s that for hubris, huh? But really, nothing need be a failure. Nuh uh. No failure. Recalibration. That’s my new perspective. Course corrections, if you will. Life is like a GPS device: Overshoot a mark? It recalibrates your route and you still get where you’re going. It might take a few more minutes, but big deal. The destination isn’t going anywhere, now, is it?
So, I commend you for all the lessons learned on your walk. Chief among them, let people help you. People *want* to help other people. Let them! Give them that gift!
And as for being last? On the 3-Day, being last is *awesome*! Because damn near EVERYONE is there cheering for you. Total rock-stardom, being last.
)
I *love* that you shredded that book! And I love your new perspective. That’s where I’m working on getting. There’s no hubris in deciding you’ve never failed. (How many experiments did Edison have to do before he got the lightbulb right? How long does it take Dr. Dennis Slamon to develop Herceptin?) Every experience is a learning experience. I might not like what I learn, but I can always apply it, right?
As I mentioned in another comment, I’ve promised myself that my answer the next time somebody offers me help will be an enthusiastic, “Yes, thank you.” There is absolutely no reason to turn down kindness, right?
As for the rock-stardom of being last… sounds fun to me, whether I’m doing the cheering or the last one in.
This was packed full of great tips! I think we can all be our worst critic sometimes! When I first started walking I worried about lagging behind too. I must also tell you that I suffered side effects from not listening to my body! Hope those blisters are healed!
Thanks, Abby. I have to admit, my body and I still aren’t quite on the same wavelength. But we’re getting there. Mostly because I’m learning to listen to what it’s telling me. And realizing that needing food, or water, or a break is not a sign of weakness. It’s just physiological fact.